Camping, Revisited

Alright, let's be honest. Nobody thought I'd EVER get around to this post, right? Even I am filled with more self-loathing than ever before. Shame on me for taking two months to write about this major life event! I mean, this alleged "camping trip"was practically a whole lifetime ago, and it's not exactly fresh on my brain now. It's like the meat you see in the grocery store that has a special fluorescent orange discount sticker on it because of its rapidly changing color and interesting smell. (Which makes me wonder, who buys that meat? Here's what I say: if I'm in a position where I don't have enough money to buy fresh, un-rotten meat, then I vote going without. But that's just me.) Anyway, that's my brain when it comes to this little trip. Once I lost the original camping posting due to some freak computer glitch, I sort of lost the will to blog about it ever again, but I feel I owe it to my kids to have it properly documented for their sake. Otherwise, they may never believe that it actually happened. Nothing like a little crazy Mom guilt to light a fire under my ass. 

Alright, buckle up! Here we go:

Here, we have a very handsome & robust Dan, modeling his camping backpack from the days of his camping bachelorhood (he's a man of SO many talents, that husband of mine). He was very excited to show me how much crap this thing could actually contain. If you look below his elbow closely, you can see that there's even a compartment for toilet paper. Such a smart backpack! Camping learned lesson #1: it's really helpful when you go camping with a husband who is so giddy to be reunited with nature, he'll even pose for backpack pictures.

I realize my awesome photography skills didn't capture much else but glare in this photo, but if you strain to look through that, you will see our very jam-packed car. Camping learned lesson #2: Camping with children requires a whole lot of stuff. What you see in this car is basically everything we own. I was nervous I'd forget SOMEthing and then be miserable for 48 hours, but in reality, I don't think we utilized half of what we brought. Rookies!

Here the kids are strapped in & ready to roll, but not unlike dogs, could probably sense Mama's tense nerves and were probably experiencing a tummy butterfly or two themselves. On second thought, maybe they were just scared things were going to crush them, because please notice the mountain of cargo behind them.

Here, Ella is like, "You guys are crazy and make me want to jump out of this dang car seat, but you do always feed me, so therefore I'll stick around and surrender to this chaos." For a baby under 2, she really is wise beyond her years. Also, aren't her rag-a-muffin pigtails the cutest you've ever seen?

Here, Ben is like, "Doesn't this blue shirt bring out my gorgeous blue eyes? Also, are we there yet? WHY DOES IT LOOK LIKE WE'RE STILL PARKED IN THE GARAGE?"

So fast forward the fairly uneventful 60+ minute car ride up to Big Basin, and now we've arrived. Except timing wasn't our greatest strength that day because we didn't have much daylight left, and I won't lie; there was some panic as the fellas set up camp. The realization of- wait, there are zero light switches we get to flip when it gets dark- slowly set in. Nobody wants to set up a (ginormous) tent in the darkness. So the boys huddled up, devised a plan, and got to work. My Dan is on the left, our dear friend (the "other" Dan) is on the right. Please notice his kneepads- this is serious camping business. 

They saved the day! Tent assembled! Number of injuries: 0. Sounds like the perfect time to open a bottle of wine! 

Isn't it breathtakingly gorgeous? Those giant wonderful trees! The delicious fresh air! Even the dirt was sort of pretty. Side note: our Mercedes-of-a-tent came fully loaded with a "front porch" area. I was sort of hoping it would be equipped with electricity as well, but I guess we had an older model.

This is Ben's semi-new favorite person in his world, and his name is Gavin. If you met him, you would want to hug him and squeeze his cheeks because he is hands-down one of the sweetest little boys on earth and has the voice of an angel. He's one of those kids who I'm hoping will forever infect Ben with his sweet, innocent boyishness. I love when they spend time together, and basically, camping was one big Ben & Gavin fest. I've never seen two boys so happy to be together, and so happy to be downright dirty.

Ben, being a scary jungle animal of sorts. And sweet Gavin- even when he's trying to be scary he's just exudes cuteness.

So remember how one of my big camping concerns was what the heck to do all day long (specifically, #6 on my top 10 list)? This was it! We sat and  learned to play a new favorite game, Mexican Train. I don't even play dominoes in any form, but this was great. Then of course, there was some beer drinking.

Then we went on a big group hike, which was lovely....until Ben's legs got too tired to keep moving. Then it got tricky. Learned camping lesson #3 : 4 miles is about 2 miles too many for a 4 year old hiker who hasn't napped. But it was gorgeous, and I got in touch with my inner hiker. She's a tigress!

Ben was thrilled to find a real-life fuzzy caterpillar:

Ella was thrilled to learn that Auntie Liz was willing to carry her a heck of a lot more than Mommy was willing. So they had some quality girl time so that Mommy could continue in Operation Laziness, and drink her beer in peace.

More friendly camping nothingness. Camping learned lesson #4: doing nothing and sitting outside is wonderful.

Here we are on our 2nd (and final) night, preparing a feast fit for a king. You might think I'm joking, but just wait for it...

Well hello perfectly marbled, gorgeous salmon! You're so cute with your pretty lemon slices-- but wait! What's this I see? Are you stuffed on the inside?!

Why yes, you are! What on earth did I do to deserve this royal treatment???? Guys, it was like manna pouring down from the heavens. Being the sushi junkie that I am, I had to stop my hand from picking it up and just eating it raw. Can you blame me?

And all I had to do was provide a black bean salad! (Don't get me wrong- the black bean salad was rad....anytime a recipe includes onion, mango & cilantro on the ingredient list, you KNOW it's going to be scrumptious. I don't even think this is a matter of opinion- it just is). The salmon (a.k.a. manna) was provided and prepared courtesy of our new friends, Rikki & Jack. (Hi Rikki & Jack! Want to go camping again?) Here is where I will mention that Jack is a real life chef...how could I NOT fall in love with camping??? Camping learned lesson #5 : Always go camping with a chef. Here they are, our Salmon Sugar-Parents:

Here's the full spread. Not too shabby for a camping trip, eh? If I was to caption this picture, it would say: Melon salad, veggies and bread, beautiful manna-salmon, three bean salad. AND WINE. Yes, as I recall, the wine was deeeeelightful. We even set up a separate table designated as "The Bar". 

This is the part of the evening when our bellies were full of salmon and wine, so we just smiled and took a bunch of photos. Here: the Findricks & Stublers

Me, Christina & Rikki. Don't you dare look at my camping greasiness!

Dewigs (minus Ben- where did Ben go? Oh right- to Gavin-land) + Findricks:

The night ended as any quintessential camping trip night should: with s'mores (Ben's 1st, my 1,001st)).... 

...And with glow stick swords! (Thanks for this picture, Kasia!)

Overall, what do I think about camping? Let me put it this way: my birthday is coming up in a month, and I'm thinking a camping trip might be in order.I think this could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship...

The "C" Word

Image via Wikipedia

The C word for the day is Camping. Eww, gross, what were YOU thinking I meant?

Anyway. Let me go ahead and paint the picture, because that's what I do best.

When I first met my husband, I quickly learned that he was a Mountain Man. He sported flannel shirts & a goatee, could build his own fire from scratch, owned rock climbing shoes (is this how one refers to them?), owned outdoorsy backpacks and hiking gear, had a R.E.I. club membership, the whole nine yards. Which is kind of hot in a mysterious getting-to-know-you type of way. He grew up in the wilderness of Evergreen, Colorado, and though sometimes I'm guilty of embellishing, this time I'm really not using the term "wilderness" loosely. Like, there were elk and bears and deer and wolves and unicorns (okay maybe that part was embellished) roaming his property on any given day, and his darling soon-to-be 80 year old father has the photos to prove it (HI HUGH!). Not only did he live in the wilderness, but he somehow still found the need, nay, the DESIRE to be a camping man in his free time. Which meant he would leave his own backyard wilderness just to hike into the wilderness of his local mountain. Funny, right? This perplexes me, because don't people usually crave the green grass on the other side? And by green grass, I mean urban life? Wouldn't it make sense for him to "vacation" by way of hiking into the city of Denver and do the touristy thing? With zero wilderness or picturesque objects in sight?

No, not this man. I swear he and Bear Grylls come from the same blood lines.

Anyway, I clearly remember the day very early on in our relationship when he asked me the big question: had I ever been camping before? Mostly I remember it because he asked with the most optimistically hopeful eyes I'd ever seen, and I immediately panicked. Have I ever been camping? Um, yes? YES! Of course! Who hasn't been camping? I mean, EVERYONE has gone camping at some point or another, right???

Hee hee. Hee.

Not so much.

Except if you count making tents out of blankets and chairs in the living room with your siblings and then sleeping there for the night. Because that kind of camping I've TOTALLY done, like a thousand times.

But I was pretty sure he meant a different kind of camping. Shoot.

I remember trying to read into the question, desperately trying to see if for him, this was a deal-breaker or not. Because I really liked this guy. A whole lot. In fact, I knew we were going to get married and have babies and a hyperactive dog once he could stop being a commitment-phobe, but what if my entire future happiness was dependent upon this one teeny little thing? Who would've guessed that camping would be so crucial to my future?

So I told him yes. Because the truth is, I've been camping half a time. As in .5. Or if fractions are your thing, 1/2.

The memory is a bit hazy, but I recall my parents packing us up in the 1976 Buick station wagon (a car that I still rocked in high school, practically making me the coolest girl on campus), making the trip to some sort of foreign campsite where my parents fumbled with setting up a tent and we all tried to act like we knew what we were doing, but really we were grumpy and miserable and confused. I recall a hefty dose of familial tension. At the time, my sister was just a baby, and she crawled over us all night long while we tried to sleep. I had a large, pointy boulder underneath my sweet little head for a pillow. Around the bedtime hour, we quickly learned of some nearby drunken campers who got a bit out of hand, so our nighttime lullaby was the sweet tune of belligerent drunks receiving a police escort out of the campgrounds. In the midst of this chaos, one of their cars ran over their "boombox" music player and smashed it to pieces. It was painfully loud and I think I heard them utter more 4 letter words than I'd ever heard in my sheltered life.

So....I haven't exactly had a burning desire to do THAT again.

Which is why I must be CRAZY for agreeing to go camping in about a month! WITH MY KIDS IN TOW. Not only am I clueless about how to prepare/what to expect when camping, I am now dragging my poor innocent children along with me. (Full disclosure: it's only for a weekend, and we are going with other families, and some of these people are practically professional campers. So that helps a little, but then again they aren't the ones responsible for packing up our entire life and fitting it into our car.) My only safety net was the confidence I had in Dan with his camping history & knowledge. However, when I mentioned this to him, he scoffed and said, "Babe, I know how to camp like a single guy. But I have no idea how to camp with kids as a family."

Super.

But because I'm a gal who believes in conquering one's fears (except if the fear involves snakes), I've decided to face this dead on and make note of my camping fears. Let's approach this in list format, shall we?

"Reasons I Am Terrified To Go Camping, Let Alone Go Camping With Children":

1. What if the smell of campfire and spilled beer never washes off my body & skin (and sleeping bag!)?
2. What if the wine runs dry?
3. How many times can a person really eat hot dogs for a meal???
4. Snakes. All types.
5. My children thrive in their routine. Routine of their own beds and their own 4 walls. What if my kids never go to sleep and this trip turns into a 48 hour rave, family style?
6. What the heck are we supposed to DO all day? Sit? Talk? Drink? I don't understand.
7. B.O. and armpit hair stubble. There, I said it.
8. They say camping is an excellent way to test a relationship. WHAT IF WE DON'T PASS THE TEST?
9. Bugs.
10. Battling the elements. I don't care much for battles in general, let alone battles that involve the elements.

That's all I've got for now, but I'm sure as the time draws closer, I'll have dozens more. If you have the answers to my fears or my questions, please comment and help a sister out. Seriously, it just might be my only hope for surviving. That and the stockpile of wine we'll be carting around.

Stay-cation Sunday

What do you do when you're looking for something different to do on a Sunday evening, but feel exhausted and the effects of the economy? You pitch a tent in your backyard, of course!

The kids went to bed early, and Mr. Dan the Camper Man took the opportunity to whip out the old Dewig tent (from the days of his crazy camping bachelor days). He convinced me to join him for a snuggle while we enjoyed this warm, gorgeous Sunday evening.

This is our lovely backyard view from inside the tent. I don't know as though I've ever laid down in my own backyard in the last 3 homes we've lived in. I won't lie- it was really great. Milestone #1.

So as we were laying there snuggling I proceeded to get the giggles because there's just something really humorous to me about lying in your husbands arms on the ground in a tent. In your own backyard. While two children are sleeping. Inside. And then I began thinking about all the hardcore camping and backpacking and hiking that Dan did in his days of youth growing up in Colorado, and then I'm immediately thinking how my own childhood outdoor experiences were completely contrary to his- in fact, just lying here in my own backyard is about the closest I've ever come to camping. And I'm completely enjoying the moment, truly I am. Dan is so happy in his element, and I can tell he's just so darn proud to have his wife in his tent FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER (before I entered his tent, I asked him how many girls had been in there before me, and he happily reported: none. Great answer). But immediately, I'm spinning with 200 questions. Why is it so smelly in here? Is there mold growing in here? How can these thin flimsy little strips of fabric really protect us from the elements? Could this thing up and fly away? Is there more homemade ice cream?

And then I sort of looked up at him with a bright new realization and asked "This is the closest thing to a vacation we're going to have this summer, isn't it?" That dear sweet husband of mine replied, "Yep, and this tent will still be up, right here tomorrow." So far, our Staycation is lovely and I'm actually sincerely anticipating doing it all over again tomorrow evening. (Milestone #2.) Perhaps we'll send you a postcard.

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